While I hate having a chronic condition that causes nausia, dizziness and extreme exhaustion (Damned Meniere’s), I do appreciate that it makes me look at everything in my life that does go right and appreciate it a little more. Especially since that’s about all I’ve been able to do effectively this week. I’ve been managing it fairly well for the last few years, and I had managed to avoid any seriously inconvenient attacks for a very long time, but somehow I managed to mess up either my diet, or my stress levels this last week and I have been paying for it. Legge’s been nice enough to take Miriam in the evenings so that I can recline (I can’t lay down again) and rest. I think the worst part is being tired all the time. I can handle being dizzy (I usually am anyway after spinning Ducky around in circles), and I can handle not wanting to eat (YAY size two), but being tired means I can’t work out, which is how I use my alone time. It’s a great way to destress, but since the dark makes things worse, and Iowa is already getting dark in the morning, I’ve had to skip the last few days and it’s making me very grumpy. I’m hoping to get out for my run tonight. It’s hot, humid, nasty and supposed to rain, but I’m up for it because it doesn’t get dark until 9!!! (I never thought I’d miss ND and it’s perpetual summer sunlight so much)
Anyway, this week does make me appreciate that 85% of the time I feel great, that this isn’t genetic, so I don’t have to worry about Ducky getting it, and that I have friends and family to help me out when I can’t do things like drive.
One last thing, since I went to get the mail mid-post. How the hell did I end up on the charitable donations mailing list. In the last three days I have gotten donation requests from: Easter Seals, St. Judes (ok, I know this one since I give to them twice a year), Breast Cancer Foundation, Iowa Cancer Research, Iowa Veterans something or other, and the Salvation Army. For goodness sake, I’m not a nice person, I don’t give money to these people, why are they killing all these trees to mail me? It’s not even a single mailing. The breast cancer and Iowa cancer place has mailed me the same request every week for a month! Silly people.
Grrr!
July 31, 2008 at 7:12 PM (Uncategorized)
How are you supposed to feel?
July 27, 2008 at 1:45 PM (Family)
My mother called last night, and I could tell as soon as I answered that she was upset about something, which usually is not a good sign. My mother is odd, but not one to reach out and touch when she’s irritated or just sad. She had to put one of her cats down yesterday, which I understand is a huge deal for her. Her cats are her life, and I think at some point my parents turned into those people who see their pets as their kids, so I made some inane comments to try and cheer her up and apologized for the lack of new tattoos with which to distract her from her grief. (When she ran over this particular cat 8 or 9 years ago I had just gotten my first and blurted it out in an attempt to get her to stop thinking about how she almost killed her cat. It worked amazingly well.) Then she told me that she had also gotten word (though some time ago) that her father had been diagnosed with cancer and was given two months to live. This gave me some pause. Biologically he is my grandfather, and therefore there is some tie to us, but he’s never been a part of my life, and truth told, I don’t know if I’d be able to pick him out of a lineup. Mom knows and understands this, but as I’m trying to make her feel better, I wonder if I’m supposed to feel anything other than the general “Oh, I’m sorry” feeling you get when a friend tells you their grandfather died. I want to make my mother feel better, but I wonder if it will seem callous that I, personally, will have a limited reaction.
Pure Joy
July 27, 2008 at 1:24 PM (Happiness)
Yesterday was the Christmas in July silent auction at church, which is one of the fund raisers held throughout the year. This year’s money is going towards refurbishing the nursery, as as we are one of only 4 families with babies/toddlers we decided it would be a good idea to support the cause and put in a couple bids, so taking Ducks with me I went Friday afternoon to see what was up. Understand that all of the objects are donated from members’ homes, and at times it looks more like a white elephant party than anything, so the pickings are random, varied, and sometimes amusing. One of the tables held a couple of kids’ trikes, and of course Ducky saw them and would not leave them be, so I put a $2.00 bid on the toddler bike and we left. When we came back Saturday for church and the following potluck/auction results she ran straight to the little trike and tried to climb the table to get to it, so we gently told her no and took her out to the nursery. After the meal the auction results were read off and people started to receive the items they had bid on. When the little trike was brought over to our table Ducky was sitting on Ryan’s lap and her eyes got huge, her jaw dropped, her hands came up to clutch at the sides of her cheeks and there was a happy little gasp and squirm of pure baby joy as it was set on the floor in front of her. In no time she had hopped off Ryan’s lap and was sitting on top of it, happily scooting backwards around the family center. Forwards is apparently a little more difficult, because all she did forwards was crash into a table.
What do you know?
July 26, 2008 at 8:42 PM (Happiness)
I’m wondering what it means that one of the highlights of yesterday was rummaging through my sock drawer and discovering a fresh, brand new pair of white socks. Yesterday wasn’t a bad day, but I must confess that I have a great love of socks, and that I secretly wear crazy colored ones during the winter when no one can see. The great thing about a fresh pair of white Hanes socks is that they are the world’s perfect sock. There is little I like more to feel than the fluffy, undamaged elasticity hugging my feet. Just the right amount of cushioning, just the right amount of squeeze, it’s like a little anti-massage just for my toes. Sadly this is usually destroyed within the first couple of washings, and then it’s back to regular old socks until the next time I have to buy new ones, usually once a year or so. That is why it was such a delight to find them in my drawer yesterday. I had already bought socks for the year, two bags worth, and I thought I’d gone through all of the new ones, even though I had tried to ration them out, but there they were, hiding in the back corner rolled up and waiting for me. I quietly slipped them on and happily wandered about the house, while Ryan just went about his daily routine of assuming his wife was insane.
Drinks, Diapers & Deities 